Paralyzed
by babybenson96
Summary: When two equally damaged women fall for one another, will they be able to form a beautiful relationship full of understanding and passion? And when events from their haunted pasts surface once again, will their love be enough to make it through the storm?
1. Chapter 1

**Alright. So let me just start by saying that I am STOKED about starting this story. I've got a pretty good idea of where I wanna go with it, but we'll see. Also, I definitely can't take all the credit for this story. A lot of what you'll see here was inspired by the mini-fanfics Alix, Grace Elisabeth, and I tweet to each other. So props to them for being so amazing! **

**Furthermore, please leave your reviews and let me know what you think! **

**-Jen**

***I DO NOT OWN SVU OR THE CHARACTERS MENTIONED***

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December had just arrived and the first snow was already blanketing the streets of New York. Amanda was lying in bed. She turned over and the alarm clock on her nightstand read 6:01am. She hadn't been able to get any sleep. They'd lost the case they'd been working on for weeks—and the look on Alice Griffin's face—the victim—when the verdict of not guilty came in, had shattered Amanda's heart. Amanda still hadn't gotten used to the feeling of losing a case—she probably never would. Olivia had reassured her that they'd done everything in their power to produce a solid case, but the final decision would always lie in the hands of the jury.

Olivia.

From the moment Amanda had laid eyes on her, Olivia had consumed her every thought. The way her chestnut colored hair fell freely past her shoulders, the way her warm brown eyes were understanding yet brave, everything about her was perfect. From the sway of her hips when she walked to the way her smile could brighten up darkest corners on earth. Amanda had fallen for Olivia—but she knew that she could never tell anyone. Everyone knew that Olivia was straight—and if Amanda told her how she felt, she'd just be making a fool out of herself.

Amanda sighed and pulled off her comforter. She sat up and checked her phone before walking to the bathroom. She turned on the shower to as hot as she could handle and threw off the large t-shirt she'd worn to bed.

Not long after she'd stepped into the shower, she heard her phone ringing in the next room and it was Cragen's ringtone. Amanda sighed and shut off the water. She grabbed a towel and made her way to the bedroom.

"Rollins"

"Amanda, we caught a case. I'll text you the address. You'll be working with Benson today; she's headed over to the scene now." Amanda gulped—she was working with Benson.

"Alright captain. I'll head out now." She tossed her phone onto the bed and sat down. She was going to be working with _Olivia. _How was she going to focus? Amanda took a deep breath and tried to compose herself as best she could.

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"Shit" Olivia mumbled to herself. She hated driving in the snow. Traffic in the city was bad enough; add some snow and a 15 minute drive turns into 1 hour. She wondered if Amanda had already arrived at the crime scene. The thought of Amanda made her heart race.  
Amanda was beautiful appearance wise—that was a fact. But it wasn't just her physical appearance that had caused Olivia to be mesmerized by her—it was the way she'd walked into the squad room on the first day—ready and full of ambition—it was also the way she was always bursting with optimism and was dedicated to finding justice for the victims. And not to mention the way that southern drawl of hers made Olivia weak at the knees.

When Cragen had stated that Olivia and Amanda would be partnered up for this case—her nerves instantly took over. Amanda's presence made concentrating very difficult for her—especially when they were working one-on-one. But, Olivia knew she had to maintain her composure and remain professional—as hard as it may be.

Olivia had finally arrived at the scene—and Amanda was already there. She was talking to Melinda when Olivia walked up. Amanda turned to her

"Mornin' Liv"

"Morning, what do we got?"

Melinda sighed

"Unidentified white female, early 20's, garbage man found her behind this dumpster. She took two bullets to the head, and there's evidence of vaginal tearing, but there's no trace of semen. I predict her time of death was around 4 this morning."

Olivia sighed

"Thanks Melinda, let us know if you find anything else"

"Will do."

Melinda walked away and Amanda turned to Olivia

"From the looks of what she's wearin', I'm thinkin' she was a prostitute"

That fucking accent of hers—it made Olivia wanna kiss her right then and there, but she had to keep herself under control—and she also had to keep her hands to herself.

"You're probably right. Why don't you go interview the garbage man while I call Cragen and fill him in?"

"Alright"

Twenty minutes later, they were sitting in the car headed to the precinct. They got stuck in the morning rush hour and decided they'd grab something to eat until it died down a little. They parked in front of a charming little café and got seated almost immediately. They were sitting across from each other and they were both silent as they waited for their coffees to arrive. Amanda was staring out the window and Olivia was pretending to be occupied on her phone. When the coffees finally arrived Amanda took a sip and looked at Olivia

"Hey Liv, can I ask you somethin'?"

Olivia put down her phone and poured creamer into her coffee

"Yeah, sure, what's up?"

Amanda hesitated for a second before continuing

"You've been with the unit for fourteen years now… so tell me, does it ever get any easier?"

Olivia looked into her piercing blue eyes and shook her head

"I wish I could tell you it does—but it doesn't."

"Yeah…I didn't think so." there was sadness in the way she'd said it, and it broke Liv's heart. She wished she could just hug Amanda, hold her, and tell her that everything would be okay—but she couldn't. And Olivia tried to shake the thoughts from her mind, but her feelings towards Amanda were growing stronger and stronger with each passing day.


	2. Chapter 2

**AH, I am so unbelievably glad and relieved that you guys enjoyed the first chapter—phew. I would also like to say that I am so grateful to everyone that has added the story to their favorites, followed the story, has left a review, and just everyone that's read it so far! I'm not too sure if there will be another update this weekend, I'm going to be extremely busy, but I'll try my best to get one up!**

**Another thing, the song "Hero/Heroine" by Boys Like Girls was ON REPEAT while I wrote this chapter! (Thanks a lot Alix—you got me hooked too) It practically screams Rolivia… ugh they're so perf. **

**Again, please feel free leave your reviews & comments! Enjoy the story ****J**

**-Jen**

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The rest of their breakfast at the café had been silent, and so had the car ride back to the precinct. Amanda had tried her best not to stare at Olivia over breakfast, but it hadn't been easy. Everything about Olivia seemed so beautiful and graceful—even the way she drank her coffee. Amanda had told herself countless times that she had to stop thinking about Olivia this way, but she couldn't –and maybe she didn't really want to. Although truth be told, sometimes Amanda wasn't sure if Olivia even liked her as a person.

Olivia always acted professional towards Amanda—but she was often short and distant with her—especially if they were alone. Amanda supposed it was probably because her and Nick were still fairly new—so Liv probably just needed some more time to warm up to the idea that her old partner, Stabler—if Amanda remembered his name correctly—wasn't there anymore. She hoped that it wouldn't be much longer until Olivia finally accepted her—_if _that was the reason she was keeping her distance from Amanda.

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When they'd finally arrived at the precinct—Olivia couldn't help but feel relieved. Breakfast and the drive over had been past the point of awkward—and Olivia couldn't tell if it was because her and Amanda just didn't have anything to talk about—or maybe it was something else.

Olivia sometimes felt as if there was a strong, mutual feeling of sexual tension between the two of them—but she would never approach Amanda about it—because if it were true, it would cause too many problems.

The elevator ride up to the squad room had been silent as well—Olivia wished she could've thought of something, anything, to talk about just break the uncomfortable silence. But she hadn't.  
When they walked into the squad room—Cragen was already waiting for them

"Good morning detectives, care to explain why it took you two hours to get back from the crime scene?"

"Sorry Cap—traffic was outrageous because of the snow—so we decided to let it die down and grabbed some coffee and a bite to eat." Olivia knew Cragen didn't really care for excuses but it was the truth.

"Make sure to call in next time and let me know."

"Will do" Olivia responded as she hung up her coat and walked over to her desk. She sat down and waited for her computer to start up. Cragen was almost in his office and then he turned around

"Amaro, switch desks with Amanda, It'll make it a little easier for Benson and Rollins to work on the case together." Before anyone could respond, he'd already shut the door to his office.

"Great" Olivia thought to herself—or at least she believed she'd thought that to herself—but she obviously hadn't because Amanda turned to her and looked stunned

"Um, sorry but is there a problem with me Liv?"

Shit shit shit. Olivia felt like such an idiot. She'd accidently let that "great" slip out, she had to think of something to say—and she had to think quickly. So she smiled at Amanda and shook her head

"Of course not Rollins, just that Fin is out—meaning Amaro and Munch are paired up. And we all know how Nick gets his panties in a bunch whenever he works with the Man of Conspiracies." That sounded reasonable—or so Olivia hoped.

Amanda chuckled and sat down at the desk across from Olivia's

"That's true. Sorry, I didn't mean to come off sounding snarky but really, if there's anything you need to tell me or if there's a problem with me…"

Olivia furrowed her brows

"Look Amanda, I know I haven't been the most pleasant person to work with since you got here—but please don't think I have anything against you… I've just got a lot going on that's all."

Amanda gave her a wry smile nodded

"Got it"

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Nighttime came quickly that day, it was well past 11 and Amanda was still at her desk working on the case. Olivia had gone home around 9. They hadn't been able to identify the victim—or let alone produce a suspect—so Cragen told both Olivia and Amanda they could go home. Amanda had stayed because she wasn't that tired and it wasn't like she had anyone waiting for her at home. The squad room was basically empty aside from the few rookies that had stuck around to finish up some paperwork.

Amanda looked around and sighed. She knew she probably wasn't going to find anything new about the case tonight, so she maybe she should go home after all. She looked out the window and saw that the snow was falling again. She grabbed her coat and slipped on her gloves and hat. She turned off the lamp on her desk that sat by a stack of paperwork Cabot would be picking up in the morning and headed towards the elevator.

When she stepped outside, a cold gust of wind caused her to shiver. She slowly started making her way to the train station—the snow was already half a foot high—but she didn't mind it. Snow in Atlanta was very rare, and when it did come—it was only about an inch high. When Amanda was growing up, she'd always wished they'd get a big snow storm, but it never came. But, when she was 10 years old, her family took a trip to Connecticut—and there, she'd witnessed her first real snow storm. The snow was about a foot and a half high, and she remembers she could barely walk around in it. Her and her sister had a snowball fight—and they'd even attempted to build a snowman, but it just ended up looking like a giant lump with a carrot and two sticks poking out of it.

Amanda was lost in her thoughts—remembering the beautiful memory—when she was passed by McSorley's —a bar that was popular among cops, and she suddenly caught a glimpse of a familiar face sitting inside.

Olivia.

Amanda stopped dead in her tracks. Olivia was sitting alone at the bar, sipping on a beer—and then she looked outside and spotted Amanda. Olivia smiled and mouthed for her to come in.

Amanda took a deep breath.  
Her, liquor, and Olivia.  
There were only so many ways this night could end.


	3. Chapter 3

**So I'm trying to pace this story—because I know how frustrating it can be when you're reading a story and there's a bunch of extra information—I also know that when that happens, I skip right over it haha. But, as much as I would love to get to the good stuff, I don't wanna move too fast, so please be patient! We'll get to the good ole' lovin' eventually, I promise! I just wanna build up some angst and drama first ;) **

**Also, I would once again like to thank everyone that has left reviews, followed/favorited the story, and to everyone else that has been reading it!**

**For this chapter, the song "Flawless" by Katy McAllister was motivating me! I really suggest you go listen to it before you even read this chapter—it's an amazing song!**

**Enjoy the story 3**

**-Jen**

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Amanda slowly made her way into the bar. She was sweating profusely and her heart felt like it was going to explode. She tried to calm down, but it was useless. She hung her jacket up on the coatrack by the door and shoved her gloves and hat into one of the pockets. She slowly walked over to a seat at the bar next to Olivia, when she was finally seated, she turned to the bartender and ordered a beer. Olivia then shifted in her seat to face the blonde

"You're out late Rollins," there was something in the way Olivia had spoken, she almost seemed…flirtatious. Amanda wondered to herself just how long Olivia had been at the bar, and if maybe she was drunk.

"Uh, yeah, I kept working on the case after you left but I didn't come up with anything." Amanda was trying not to make eye contact with her so she sipped on her beer—but Olivia was staring her down. She narrowed her eyes before speaking

"Amanda, have I ever told you about my old partner—Stabler?" Amanda gulped. She'd asked Fin about Olivia's old partner once—but she'd quickly realized that no one liked brining him up. Fin had just told her that he was a good cop, an even better dad, and that'd he'd been Olivia's partner for twelve years. But Amanda had heard from others around the precinct that they'd been more than partners—they'd been best friends and a support system for one another. Many people had also told her that they believed they were sleeping together—but Amanda felt like she knew Olivia better than that.

Amanda realized that Olivia was waiting for her to answer—so she chugged down the rest of her beer and ordered another before answering her

"Oh, um, no…you haven't. I mean, I've just heard that he was a really great detective and stuff like that, ya know." Olivia let out a small chuckle

"Yeah, he was a great detective. Helped me get through a lot of shit. I trusted him, and he trusted me—but then at the very end—he let me down," she took a deep breath before continuing "he left and he didn't tell me why, actually he didn't tell me anything—not even goodbye. Really fucked me up." By now, Amanda could tell Olivia had had a few too many—she never would've admitted to any of this if she would've been sober.

"Liv, I-I'm sorry…that must have been really hard. You know Olivia, I really appreciate you opening up with me and trusting me with this…but is there…a specific reason you're telling me all of this?" Olivia nodded her head and bit on her lower lip

"Yes. Amanda, we're partners now. And I need to know that I can trust you. I need to know you won't…that you won't let me down the way Elliot did," her voice was cracking and Amanda could see tears welling up in her brown eyes.

"Olivia—I promise—I won't disappoint you. I'm your partner, and you can trust me—no matter what." Amanda realized she'd placed her hand on Olivia's lower back and she quickly pulled her hand away. Olivia wiped her cheek

"Good," she nodded once again "Now whaddya say we have some fun, partner? Bartender—get us four shots of tequila please." She then turned to the Amanda and gave her a coy smile—hope you can handle your liquor Rollins." Amanda's pulse was racing once again—faster than before—was it possible that she'd been right? Was Olivia _flirting _with her? The thought excited her. She turned to her partner and smirked

"You must not know how we do it down south Detective Benson."

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Olivia's mind was a fog—it was already 3am and she was still at McSorley's with Amanda. She knew she was hammered—and that'd she'd regret it in the morning—but right now, she didn't care. She was with Amanda—who seemed to be just as drunk.

"Manda—you shouldn't go home by yourself on the subway at this time. If you want you can stay the night at my house, it's just a few blocks away." Olivia's words were slurred and she stared at Amanda as she waited for a response

"Yeah, that sounds good, but we should probably get going." Amanda could barely keep her eyes open—but her pulse started racing—she was going to spend the night at Olivia's apartment. She instantly regretted agreeing to the arrangement—but before she even had the chance to say "never mind," Olivia had already grabbed their coats. They quickly slipped them on and stepped out in the cold. The snow had stopped, but it was now just a few inches below their knees—it would've taken Amanda ages to get home.

Olivia adjusted her scarf and then turned to Amanda—linking their arms together. They both smiled and began making their way to Olivia's apartment. Walking through the snow was a challenge—and every now and again they would stumble and fall into the snow—causing them to erupt in giggles.

In between one of their laughing fits—Olivia realized something. She'd realized that she was happy—and she hadn't felt this way in a long time. But this was a different kind of happiness—the kind that had only hit Olivia once before.

It was the type of happiness that you only experienced when you were in _love. _She'd only felt this feeling once before—and it had been whenever she'd been around Elliot. But, towards the end of their partnership—she hadn't felt this way anymore. She could admit it—for a long time, she'd been in love with her ex-partner. But one day something had clicked—and she began to only see Elliot as a best friend, or a brother.

Olivia quickly snapped out of her daydream and turned to look at Amanda—who looked back at her with her bright blue eyes and windblown hair.

Then it hit her—she was in love with Amanda.

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**Wah, so I really don't know how I feel about this chapter… it's a little iffy for me, so let me know what you think please! **


	4. Chapter 4

**So I'm trying to get these updates up as soon as possible but like I've said—now that I'm trying to juggle two stories, I'm still trying to figure out how to manage my time wisely. As always, I would love to thank everyone that has been following/favoriting/reviewing the story—it means more to me than you know! **

**Another thing I wanted to add in here was if anyone would be interested in being my beta for this story? I feel like it'd be great to have someone kind of give me some advice/ideas and go through the story to work out any kinks. If anyone is interested, please PM me and let me know!**

**Thanks & enjoy the story!**

**-Jen**

**P.S. –I've kinda got this little playlist going on for this story, and I really recommend listening to the song mentioned for each chapter—not only are they great songs that inspire me while I write each chapter, but they're also all perfect for Rolivia! **

**Song for this chapter: "Endlessly" by Green River Ordinance **

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By the time they'd reached Olivia's apartment it was about a quarter to four. Olivia had given Amanda a towel, and a pair of yoga pants and a sweatshirt to sleep in. Amanda walked into the bathroom and shut the door. She stood in front of the mirror and stared at her reflection. Her eyes were bloodshot—she couldn't tell if it was from all of the alcohol she'd consumed or her lack of sleep. It was probably a mixture of both.

She kicked off her boots before slipping off her black slacks and her favorite blue sweater. She turned on the water in the shower until it was nice and steamy and she stepped in. She stood there for a few minutes and let the hot water hit her back. She realized she'd been in there for well past ten minutes and quickly squirted some of the shampoo that was sitting on the shelf in the shower into her hand. She scrubbed it into her hair and washed it out before grabbing the soap that was sitting on the ledge. She rapidly washed herself and shut off the water. She reached for the towel Olivia had given her and dried herself off.

She was about to slip on the pants Olivia had lent her and then she realized she didn't have any underwear.

"Shit" she whispered to herself. She sighed and put on the pants—commando-style. She pulled on the grey sweatshirt and towel dried her blonde hair before walking out of the bathroom. When she stepped out, she padded into the kitchen and Olivia was grabbing a bottle of water out of the refrigerator.

"Want one?" she asked but before Amanda could answer she was already pulling out another bottle from the fridge. She then reached into one of the cabinets and grabbed a bottle of aspirin. She took out two of the pills and passed them to Amanda.

"You'll thank me later," she winked and took a sip of her water "I'm gonna head to bed. Help yourself to anything in the fridge—not that there's much. Oh, I set you up in the guest bedroom slash office; I put some extra blankets on the bed in case you get cold."

"Sounds good. Thanks Liv." Amanda smiled and tried to keep her eyes open—she was exhausted and couldn't wait to lie down.

"No problem. If you need anything just lemme know." Olivia left and walked into the bathroom. Amanda finished her water and walked over to the coatrack by the door. She retrieved her phone from one of the pockets and made her way to the guest room.

The room was painted a warm shade of yellow; there was a black desk on the far right corner and a bookshelf right next to it. The bed was a full size and there were a few blankets folded on the end of it. Amanda walked over to the nightstand next to the bed and set down her phone. She tossed the throw pillows that were placed on top of the bed onto the chair by the desk before shutting of the light. She made her way to the bed and slipped under the warm covers. She let out a deep breath and her mind slowly drifted away, she fell asleep almost instantly.

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Amanda slowly opened her eyes and blinked a few times before her eyes came into focus. She looked around for a few seconds—where was she? Then she remembered—she'd spent the night at _Olivia's _house. Her head was pounding and she groaned. She then turned on her side and reached for her phone to check the time, it was already 11:30am. She quickly sat up—she was late for work. She looked at the time again and then realized it was Saturday. She let out a sigh of relief and stretched before walking out into the hallway.

Olivia was sitting in the living room sipping on a cup of coffee and watching TV. Amanda slowly walked over and made herself promise that she wouldn't let things get awkward with Olivia. Maybe it'd been the alcohol getting to Olivia—or maybe Amanda had misread the whole thing—but she could've sworn Olivia had been flirting with her at the bar.

"Hey, you been up long?" Amanda asked. Olivia turned around and looked at her before giving her a small smile

"No, just got up a few minutes ago. Glad to I see I'm not the only one with the hangover from hell," she set down her coffee "I'd offer you something to eat but all I've got is some old Chinese food, water, and coffee." Amanda smiled and shook her head

"Sounds like my fridge. Guess it's a cop thing."

Olivia chuckled and nodded

"Guess so. But I'm starving, you up for some pancakes at Pearl Diner?"

"Only if it's your treat," Amanda smiled before continuing "after all, it is kinda your fault I feel like I got hit by a truck." Olivia laughed loudly and stood up

"Fair enough Rollins. I'm gonna go try to shower off this hangover. I'll be ready in 10. There's some coffee in the kitchen if you want." She then grabbed her cup off of the coffee table and placed it on the kitchen counter before walking into the bathroom.

Amanda walked back into the bedroom where she'd stayed and slipped on the clothes she'd worn the previous day. She slipped her phone into the back pocket of her pants and walked into the kitchen. She searched through Olivia's cabinets for a coffee mug and when she finally found one, she poured herself some of the freshly brewed coffee. She could still hear the shower running so she made her way to the living room and took a seat on the sofa.

She was drinking her coffee and watching some bogus cop show when she heard a knock on the front door.

"Hey Amanda, would you mind seeing whose at the door?" Olivia shouted from the bathroom.

"Yeah, sure, no problem Liv." Amanda set down her cup and walked over to the front door. She cracked the door open and saw a man standing there. He was handsome, with dark hair, and eyes that were just as blue as hers. She didn't recognize him

"Um, hi. How can I help you?" she asked. He looked confused at narrowed his eyes

"Yeah, sorry, uh, is Olivia Benson here?" Amanda opened the door a little bit wider. He obviously knew Olivia so she gave him a small smile

"Yeah, she's in the bathroom. Sorry but, who are you? Didn't catch your name." the man eyed her for a few seconds before answering

"Uh, I'm Elliot Stabler. And you are…?"


	5. Chapter 5

**So let me just start off by apologizing for not updating in so long. This is actually a really short chapter, but I guess it's better than nothing. Think of it as a filler if you want, because the next chapter is definitely going to be really exciting. I just really wasn't sure how I wanted this chapter and where I wanted it to go—but I figured it out :) Anyways, as always, I would like to thank everyone that's been reading this story and encouraging me to continue, it means a lot! Enjoy the story!**

**-Jen**

**Song for this chapter: Bullet Proof Vest by Dave Stewart ft. Colbie Caillat**

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Amanda's heart stopped. Elliot Stabler—Olivia's old partner—was standing in front of her. She attempted to get herself together and stuck out her hand for a handshake

"Amanda Rollins, nice to meet you." His gaze softened slightly and he shook her hand.

Olivia opened the door to her bathroom

"Amanda, who's at the door?" But before she could reply, Elliot gently pushed the door open and stepped into the apartment.

"It's me." Olivia's eyes widened and she could feel a million questions beginning to form in her mind.

"Elliot. What—what are you doing here?" She stepped out of the bathroom and walked towards the man she once called her partner and best friend.

"Liv, I wanna talk to you about something" He turned to the Amanda who had been standing awkwardly by the door "can we um, have a minute, please?" Amanda quickly looked at the Olivia but Olivia was still staring at Elliot in shock.

"Yeah, actually I think it'd be best if I get going, I—"

"No Amanda, you don't have to go. Elliot isn't gonna be long here. Just wait for me downstairs in the car. The car keys are on the kitchen counter." As Olivia spoke, she still hadn't torn her gaze from Elliot. Amanda quietly grabbed the keys that were sitting by the kitchen sink and walked out of the apartment.

"Elliot, do you mind telling me what the hell is going on here?" Olivia's brows were furrowed and she had her arms crossed against her chest defensively. He took out a deep breath and stared at the brunette for a few seconds before speaking

"I'm coming back." Olivia almost collapsed. She thought maybe she'd heard wrong

"Come again?" Elliot smirked and leaned up against the door

"I'm coming back to Special Victims, Liv. We're gonna be partners again, and look I know I really fucked things up between us and I'm sorry but—" his attempt at apologizing was interrupted when Olivia let out a small chuckle.

"What's so funny Benson?" Olivia looked back up at him and scoffed

"You are, _Stabler. _You're coming back to SVU and what? You think things are gonna go back to the way they used to be? You think it's gonna be Benson and Stabler again? Well guess what—it's not. Things have changed Elliot._ I've_ changed," she started for the coat rack and grabbed her jacket. She slipped it on and looked at her old partner once again before continuing "and besides, I already have a partner." And with that, she opened the door and signaled for him to leave. She stepped out after he did and locked the door. She turned to him

"See ya." And with that, she left. And he stood, there, motionless, because the news that he would be returning to the Special Victims Unit hadn't even fazed her.

Olivia had moved on.

She descended the steps to the first floor and walked out into the cold. The snow from the previous night had already been cleared from the roads but Olivia thought about how she and Amanda had been giggling together and had occasionally fallen into the cold fluff. Olivia smiled to herself and walked towards her car.

When she reached her car, she opened the door and took her seat behind the wheel. Amanda was quietly looking out the window before she turned towards Olivia

"So that was your old partner, huh?" Amanda didn't make eye contact until Olivia let out a small huff

"Yeah. He um.. he's coming back to SVU." Amanda's eyed widened

"Oh. So…are you guys…gonna be partners again?" Olivia smiled and shook her head

"Nope. I've got a partner, remember?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello beautiful people! Once again I would like to apologize for the delay in updating. I would like to thank Kyeley though, for being the inspiration behind this chapter. There WILL be another update tomorrow, so be excited! Don't forget to leave feedback and reviews!**

**Also, I ask that everyone please keep the families affected by the tragedy in CT in their thoughts and prayers, it truly is heartbreaking. **

**All the best,**

**Jen**

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Monday had arrived sooner than Amanda had hoped. Today was the day that Elliot Stabler would be coming back. He was Olivia's old partner, and maybe even a past lover.

Amanda walked into the squad room and was instantly shocked to find that she was the last detective to arrive. But what shocked her more was the fact that Elliot was sitting in the desk directly across from her. The blonde detective slowly made her way to her desk and gave Olivia a brief smile and "mornin' Liv" as she passed by. Olivia returned the gesture with a "good morning."

When Amanda reached her desk, she tried to avoid making eye contact with Elliot but she could feel his glare. She sat down and switched on her computer before she looked up at him.

"Hey" she said softly. He narrowed his eyes and stared at her for a few seconds before he responded

"so we meet again" he replied, obviously amused. Amanda didn't know what to say—luckily, Cragen came out before she had to say anything.

"Everyone in my office please" he announced. The detectives all exchanged a look and made their way to his office. Once they were all inside, Fin closed the door. Olivia was the first to speak up

"What's up Cap?" she asked.

"Well, first of all I would like to officially welcome Elliot back. Elliot I'm not sure if you've met our newest detectives but this is Nick Amaro and this is Amanda Rollins. Rollins, Amaro, this is Elliot Stabler, one of the best detectives in the NYPD." Nick extended his hand and the two men shared a formal "nice to meet you." Elliot and Amanda then did the same, although it wasn't their first time meeting.

Olivia's cheeks had turned a deep shade of red and she could feel herself beginning to sweat. The whole situation was just awkward and the tension in the air was overwhelming. Olivia spoke up once again, hoping that was the only reason everyone had been called into his office,

"So are we done here Cap?" Cragen looked at Olivia and shook his head

"No. There's one more reason I called you all in here. Now that there's an even number of detectives, that means everyone will have a partner. For the next couple of weeks we'll be rotating every couple of days just until I figure out who works best with who. For now, I want Munch and Amaro, Benson and Fin, and Rollins and Stabler. This is only temporary so don't get too comfortable. You're all dismissed."

Olivia felt as if she was going to faint. Elliot and Amanda were going to be working together. Olivia made her way back to her desk and grabbed her coat. She needed some fresh air. Right as she was about to make her way to the elevators, Cragen stepped out of his office once again,

"Liv, Fin, we caught a new case. A college student from NYU was attacked last night inside her dorm room. Her roommate found her this morning when she got back from a party. The vic just regained consciousness. She's over at New York Presbyterian, see if you can get any information. Stabler, Rollins, head over to the crime scene and see if the perp left anything behind, the roommate is over there, interview her." The detectives all looked around at each other but no one moved. Cragen looked at the detectives and took a deep breath,

"today ladies and gentlemen." Everyone immediately stood up and grabbed their coats. Olivia, Fin, Amanda, and Elliot made their way to the elevators. No one said anything on the ride down and when the doors finally opened Olivia hurried out. She stepped outside into the cold Manhattan air and took a deep breath. Fin came up behind her and placed his hand on her back

"You okay, Liv?" he asked. She gave him a small smile

"I'm fine."

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The car ride with Elliot was past the point of awkward, and to top it off—they'd caught the morning rush hour. They were at a stop light when Elliot turned down the radio and turned to Amanda,

"So, you and Liv…" Amanda's heart started racing and she could feel her cheeks turning red

"What about us?" She asked as she looked straight ahead, once again avoiding eye contact with him. He did the same thing he'd done before, where he narrowed his eyes and stared at her before he replied. For some reason it irked Amanda so she let out a deep sigh in hopes that he'd catch the drift that he was annoying her. He obviously didn't,

"Do you guys I don't know, have some partner-slash-lover thing goin' on?" Amanda felt as if her heart was about to combust. Was this what a heart attack felt like? Somehow though, she managed to take a deep breath and look into his blue eyes with hers, he had a smirk on his face that made her feel like strangling him. She unclenched her fist and stared at him for before replying, just like he'd done to her,

"No. But I think _I'm _the one that should be askin' that question bout you and Liv, Stabler."


	7. Chapter 7

**So, here's chapter seven as promised! I hope everyone enjoys it! Thank you to everyone whose been keeping up with the story, it means so much! Don't forget to leave feedback and reviews! **

** -Jen**

** Song for this chapter: "be without you" by Mary j blige **

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"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Elliot asked, obviously taken aback by Amanda's comment. The blonde detective simply scoffed and turned towards the window. Elliot's brows furrowed and he sighed before speaking once again

"Look, I'm fully aware of the rumors about me and Liv being more than partners. But none of that shit was true. I was married when Liv and I were partners, and that's all we ever were, partners."

Amanda closed her eyes and rested her head against the window

"Just drive Stabler."

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When Olivia and Fin had finally returned to the precinct Elliot and Amanda were already on their fourth cups of coffee.

Cragen stepped out of his office

"Liv, Fin, what'd the vic tell you?" Olivia sighed as poured herself a cup of coffee

"Claims she didn't recognize her attacker and doesn't know how he got into the building. The perp used a condom, so we don't have much." Cragen sighed and turned to Elliot and Amanda

"What about you guys? Did you find anything at the scene? Did the roommate tell you anything?" Amanda was about to respond but Elliot beat her to it

"We didn't find much in the dorm room but me and Rollins are going over the security tapes from the building right now. The roommate claims she doesn't know who could've done this and says she was at a party from 10pm last night till 5am this morning." Cragen nodded

"Alright. Munch, Amaro, why don't you head back over to the scene and ask around, maybe somebody saw something, " the two detectives stood up, grabbed their coats, and headed towards the elevators.

"Liv, Fin, just sit tight for a little. You guys can talk to the victim again tomorrow morning, maybe she'll remember something." Cragen then walked back into his office and shut the door.

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The rest of the day had gone by at a glacial pace and Amanda couldn't wait to go home.

Elliot sat back in his chair and crossed his arms behind his head. He was staring at Amanda and she immediately noticed. She looked up and rolled her eyes

"Need somethin', Stabler?" He chuckled and leaned forward. His voice was loud enough for Amanda to hear but too low for any of the other detectives to hear

"Look, I think we got off on the wrong foot, and that's partially my fault. But we're gonna be working together now so whaddya say we start over? Maybe over drinks, after we get outta here? It'll be a good time." Amanda was shocked. She sat back in her chair, let out a deep breath, and shook her head

"Elliot, I-I can't. Look I'm all for starting over but I'm just tired and just really not up for drinks tonight, sorry." It was only partially a lie. Amanda was tired, although she actually could use a drink. But the thought of being alone with Elliot in a bar just didn't sound like a good idea to her. After all, what would Olivia think? Amanda was head-over-heels for Olivia, but she wasn't sure if Olivia felt the same way. Hell, she didn't even know if Olivia was gay. But for some reason Amanda felt like getting drunk with Elliot would just complicate things.

Elliot gave Amanda a small smile and nodded

"I understand. Some other time." And right after he said that, Cragen stepped out of his office yet again

"Everyone, you can all wrap up what you're working on and then head out. Goodnight." Amanda let out a sigh of relief. Finally, she could go home.

Amanda looked around and didn't see Olivia. Her coat and purse were still on her desk so Amanda figured she was probably in the restroom. The blonde detective stood up from her desk and headed towards the door to the ladies room. She opened it and immediately saw Olivia standing by the sink, and her eyes were red-she'd been crying. Alarmed, Amanda walked over the older detective

"Liv, what's wrong? Is everything okay?" Olivia shook her head

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just think that Elliot coming back is hitting me harder than I expected." The brunette detective's brown eyes looked up and met Amanda's blue ones.

Amanda brushed a strand of the brunette's hair away from her face and tucked it behind her ear

"I understand, Liv. This must be really hard for you. But everythin' is gonna be alright, it'll get easier, you'll see." Amanda gave Olivia a small smile but before she knew it Olivia's lips were crashing down on hers. Olivia grabbed Amanda by the waist and pulled her in closer. Amanda grabbed a handful of Olivia's brown hair and pressed Olivia up against the sink.

Just as they were getting into the kiss, Olivia pulled away

"Shit. Amanda I'm sorry, I-" but before she could finish, Amanda's lips were crashing down on Olivia's once again, this time the kiss was harder-more passionate, but after a few seconds Olivia pulled away once again

"Liv, what's wrong?" Amanda asked, confused. Olivia shook her head

"Amanda I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you. This is my fault." But before Amanda could say anything, the brunette had pushed the blonde away and was out the door.

Amanda walked out of the bathroom and when she got back to the squad room she saw Olivia slipping on her coat. Infuriated, Amanda walked to her own desk, grabbed her things and turned to Elliot

"Hey El, you still up for those drinks?" She asked loudly, to make sure that Olivia heard. Elliot looked up

"Sure, just let me grab me coat" he responded. As he was packing up, Amanda tried to get a look at Olivia.

She'd already left.

"Fuck," Amanda thought to herself "now I'm stuck with Elliot all for nothing."

But then again, the night was still young. Maybe it wasn't for nothing.


End file.
